I woke up this morning and the first thing I thought was that I don't want to get up and face the day. I don't want to deal with the mood swings and paranoia. I don't want to constantly wonder if what I'm hearing is really there. I don't want to feel my heart jump because I see black things running across the floor or up the walls. I don't want that split second image of spiders or bugs. I don't want to walk by that guy I don't even know and suddenly have a mental image of having sex with him. I just don't want to deal with any of it today.

I'm not suicidal--I just don't want to have to be out of bed and functioning in the world today. I would rather sleep and hang out in my own little world. *Sigh* Oh well. Life goes on.