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Sanada · Dec 05, 2011, 05:39 PM

Hello Puzzclar.

Writing about si and sui (on a paper), and the act of si and sui are on two different planets. I know we think about si and sui (I do every day - almost); ...........but I would never go through with suicide or act upon it. Self harm is totally different to sui, dont get me wrong - I would say to you (and I mean it) dont do it (self harm), but life and triggers are hard to deal with.

Writing about it (like in a journal or paper), is actually a good way of seeing why we self harm or think the way we do (talking with a trusted friend is good to). Puzzclar..........suicide is not an option. I am sorry to say this but it is not. What would the earth be without you....it would be with out puzzclar.
I want you here, and so do us all here at PC, and 'obviously' all your family and friends.

Puzz, I must say to you many of my oldest and youngest friends have sui'd. Where are they now..........they have gone.. (they miss so much now though)
We talked of pain, we talked of joy. I always expressed that in death I still would want both because it still told me I was still alive.

Self Harm is very different, its a deeper addiction to needing to feel. Its feeling itself, but has a very very very self destructive side (sorry).

Here is some good news for you, you will not believe this............I was in a room on sunday with about 9 people, I was in a t-shirt, the people I was with were students and ex army men and women......they saw my arms, they saw no scars..?
.......weird, we got to talking about what our passions are and what we do in the net. I 'Straight Out Said' I am/was self harming for 4 years till this year. They looked at me, they looked at my arms, they did not in 7 hours of being with them notice the scars, only when I mentioned it and they looked closer did they see (then 1 person in the room also said they self harmed too).

It was weird, and nice. What people see, and what people 'do not' see is amazing.

We talked about sui, I told them my own experiences in finding my friend who had sui'd ( he was still alive when I found him). He was a computer programer and a keybordist 'extrodanare.....he was my best buddy.
The sui was his choice, not mine (if I had been a better friend at the time I would had seen the signs, but I failed). I think of my best buddy a lot, he is missing a lot. He is missing 'our life together', he is 'gone'.
To take ones self from Earth is a bad move........there is so much to see and do (even if its eating out of dumpsters like I have to do now and again) or eating in the best cafes....see what I mean - i do both.

To ans your question is 'yes' talk to your friend, your friends irl are your life. Friends have lots of hidden wisdom if the right questions bring it out. Be careful, use your own wisdom, but 'yes' talk about it to friends about it.

I do hoped this helped.
S