You may not be able to change them but you can start to make serious boundries so you protect your sanity. Need to find what you need and what you can handle and then set firm boundries. They will not be happy at first but will get used to it. You must stand firm though so before you make these rules/boundries you must consider them and whether you can stick to them without question.

It will be hard but right now thats the solution. You might want then to have a family meeting maybe after a dinner and then talk to them about it. Probably thats the perfect thing to start the New Year with...let it rest thru the holidays and this also gives you a chance with hubby to work on boundries you want enforced.

Good luck and blessings;