I'm just so tired, tired of it all. I'm tired of the flashbacks, therapy, medications, oh let's not forget not being able to sleep.

Has anyone else been too done?! I feel like I have this ever lasting virus that won't go away. When does it all end? When will peace be restored back in my life? I'm freaking 22 years old and I don't feel young and vibrant and full of life. I've seen too much in my young life, like my mentality doesn't fit nothing fits. I want to be able to relax have some fun from time to time and the only thing that's keeping me afloat is college, but I'll be done in 2 weeks so back home for break. Its embarrassing to have to explain to my roommate why I randomly wake up screaming.I'm not say "oh Jen (named changed) my step dad s.a. from 12-16, so I tend to have nightmares, but everythings ok go back to bed" I think NOT! Or have her wake up and I startle her because who's up at 4-5 am practically sitting in the dark not doing much of anything.

Somethings gotta give because if the next 30-40 years is like this I don't wanna be here. Things have to get better.........right?! :/