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Sorry that it has taken me so long to participate on my own thread. I’ve been dealing with a medical issue that took priority over this issue. Yes, we have been in an exclusive, monogamous relationship for over 3 ½ years. Now, what about that is not a commitment to me? Well, let’s see. My opinion would be that, first and foremost, you are free to walk at any time, no strings attached, NO COMMITMENT. Now, I guess that does work both ways but obviously I don’t have a problem with making it legal. In my opinion, it keeps all the things that you want to work towards as a couple separate…a house, pets, retirement, a vacation home, and any thing else that married couples, or even those who live together, would accumulate. I would mention children but we are beyond that point. Yes, these are just material things but I have had friends that have been in your type of committed relationship and what did they get in the end… Screwed! And not just female friends either. Like I said, it works both ways. In my opinion it keeps you separate no matter how much you say you are a committed couple. I mean you don’t even live together, so in my opinion, how committed are you? Really?
I actually don’t have an issue with us just living together, as they did in He’s Just Not That Into You. My boyfriend has an issue with it. He feels that it is too easy to get out of...NO COMMITMENT!!! His words. In the movie, they had been living together for several years, as I recall. Ben’s character also came right out and said he had an issue with marriage which my bf has not done. I also feel that this movie depicted couples in their 20’s and 30’s and we are way beyond that!
I have NEVER tried to guilt him and I have never cried or *****ed at ANY time that I have seen a Jared or any other jewelry store commercial where a couple is getting married. As for trying to guilt him into marriage, the last time we had this conversation I told him flat out that was the last thing I wanted to do…and it is. I told him that I understand why he feels the way he does about marriage. If my spouse had cheated on me, I think I would feel the same way. But I also told him that I felt that he needed to understand my perspective on marriage as well. I don’t have a problem if he doesn’t want to get married…my point is be man enough to say so. That way I have the truth and can make an informed decision based on the honest facts given. I would love for someone to explain to me how it emasculates him. Honestly, I do not see how it emasculates (reduces, weakens, renders powerless, makes ineffective) him or any other man, to be honest about HIS feelings and HIS future. If it emasculates (reduces, weakens, renders powerless, makes ineffective) him to be honest, and to say what he wants his future to be, well then I guess that is exactly what I am going to do when I ask him to BE HONEST!!! I feel that I am entitled to honesty about this subject since it does involve my future as well.
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