(((((Osamanda15)))))

Are you just 15? That is still very young and very uncertain about self identity yet.
I think that your trying to diagnose yourself and that is not a good idea. You haven't talked about what is going on at home that is troubling you. But I do hope you can find a guidance coucelor at school and take a time out for a private chat, they actually address many students who struggle with similar questions so they can be a lot of help.

The teen years are very challenging and young boys at this age are just not stable and capable of addressing the kind of concerns your discussing here. Hey, its not your fault, your just trying to find comfort in the wrong places.

As years pass you will grow through this time in your life and realize that many things you allowed to upset you were not as important as you thought. Don't be hard on yourself, this is normally a confusing time for most teenagers, even if they don't outright show it.

Open Eyes