Oh thanks all for your concern. We are lucky to have each other. I had my pdoc appt Friday and they were very happy with how well I was taking things. I'm so fortunate to have already been on Lamictal for a few months. They have up'd it to 200 mg (I asked for it) just to ward off any depressions and help me get through this. It really is keeping my spirits up. I really haven't this well emotionally in a long time. I think because I'm in the medical field I'm not scared. I have seen patients in much worse condition than I am. I have one patient who has been on chemotherapy for over 2 years. She had breast cancer which spread to her spine and brain. She always has a smile on her face every time I see her. Next time I see her, I want to tell her she's my inspiration to get through this. I've spent so many years depressed that this is almost a wake up call for me. I want to enjoy my life now not spend my days in misery and torture. My next set of MRI's is thursday. I'll know more then about what is actually going on so I can find out what my next steps are. Thanks all for your concern.