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Old Dec 11, 2011, 08:34 PM
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PurpleFlyingMonkeys PurpleFlyingMonkeys is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Oct 2009
Location: Louisianna
Posts: 1,473
Thank you for both of the replies.

And yes the meteor shower was amazing, I love watching the starts, they are so beautiful and represent something to me that they don't to others. There's no pain out there with the stars, they don't know hatred, they don't know abuse or anger or pain or anything of the sort. They sit there looking beautiful and I think they are there just for us to adore. Science beliefs or not, they were put there for us to have something beautiful in this world when nothing else glows, so it was wonderful as always

Lydia it is just like you said, multiple voices all at once and it makes focusing on anything at all impossible. I haven't been able to seperate the noise into voices yet but it's as if there are multiple radio talk show people tuned in at the same time. The static from the radio drowns out any possibility of understanding the talking that is taking place, but I can tell that it's something or someone talking and multiple ones at that. As far as the fading part goes, it's been getting worse for me and I can see that it leads to this and after the noise the fading returns to kind of fade me back into reality. I can't tell you how many times I have gone without even noticing the noise until the fade... It's strange that I don't notice it until something makes me notice. I don't know if this is the same but often I also have trouble speaking and understanding...

I hear people talking but their words make no sense. It's kind of like they are speaking a foreign language and I try and try to understand but the words have no meaning and no concept to me whatsoever. And now I'm beginning to speak the same way... I try to talk but my words come out wrong. In my head I am saying them correctly but for instance... Trying to say the sentance "I ate grapes and hot dogs for lunch" would end up sounding to other people like "I grate brapes and grot nogs for grench" or something of that sort... Perhaps there is a neurological problem... Or perhaps it could be a result from DID, perhaps the noise and this are connected, or not I don't know. I don't really notice any noise or any fading when my words are mixed only when others are or when I can't hear at all. Oh and I hate hate hate it when I'm looking at someone and they are talking to me and I can't even hear them at all because it's so loud in my head, but you can't explain it to them because they just don't understand it.

So confusing... I really wish my work would stop running me around with this insurance issue and let me get on medical so I can see a doc regularly!!! Sheesh!

I'm glad the noise is not something I am going through alone, at least I know I'm not crazy Thank you again for your reply
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