Hello Missyc,

I've had times in my life when I wasn't able to socialize easily. Those were very difficult times in my life. I think I understand how you feel.

As I've grown older, socializing has become easier. I used to smoke at least a pack a day of cigerrettes and ate unhealthy food and didn't exercise. Needless to say, I felt sick a lot. I think feeling physicly sick can harm someones ability to be a good friend or just be friendly to a stranger. I've quit smoking, eat healthier and I exercise regurally. I enjoy walking around the small city where I live in Maine. I enjoy sitting in the park and relaxing. I've gotten to know people who work at the local library and at a conveinence store near where I live. I worked as a cashier for a while and it seemed that the early mornings at convience stores or coffee shops are good places to find someone to talk about the weather with or something like that. Sometimes people enjoy a little small talk while they buy their coffee or newspaper. Cashiers can be friendly also, I know from experience that a friendly customer would help the time go by faster at work. Sometimes we might even share a laugh.

I go to 12 step groups also and I see a therapist and doctor.

I send e-mails to old friends sometimes and that is fun. I met one person I hadn't seen in 20 years the other day.

There are always ups and downs for all of us. It sounds like your in a down period in your life. I don't think you should isolate. That is a mean way to treat yourself. People aren't locked in solitary confinement for being sick in America. I don't think you deserve that.

Reach out for help and tell someone you trust how you feel.

Good luck!

A.