Oh, emptybee, I'm so sorry you are at this point in your life; I remember that at about that same age. I was living in Washington, D.C. and one night I was returning home from a boyfriend's (totally unsuitable boyfriend, 20 years my senior who was married and did not love me!) and I got off the bus and was standing a couple blocks from my apartment building to where I could see it and I made the mistake of doing the imagined/wanted future, large house in the country, husband/love and I sitting in wing chairs in front of the fire, reading companionably, two Irish Setters lying calmly at my feet (now there's imagination for you!) and me just soaking up the warmth and love. Then I looked over to my actual apartment building and realized I was going to live and die in that efficiency apartment the rest of my life. . . so, I burst into tears, right there in the middle of Connecticut Avenue.

That didn't happen. Yes, the tears and despair did but not the country house, dogs, or dying in that efficiency apartment. I kept working on myself in therapy and changed to a better job, the unsuitable boyfriend dropped me, refused to see me ever again, causing some of the worst pain and depression I recalled up until then, but I met someone at my new job and we fell in love and married and now I have been living happily ever after the last 28 years?

Work on getting to know yourself, being your own friend. Then others will be attracted as you are attracted to yourself (because you are a really great individual) and good things will happen but, being your own friend, it won't be desperate or unexpected, just a natural progression like learning about life is supposed to be.