I have had bi-polar disorder since who knows when....diagnosed at age 23......I have post tramatic stress syndrome since age 18.....The PTSD developed when i woke up one morning to my best friend on the floor from a heroin overdose. It is hard to talk about....and i won't get into details becuase I am new here and don't know what can be said.....but i am still unable to get over what she looked like and to this day am having the worst time with ....well everyone dying on me, i have a 31/2 year old son that i am constantly checking to see if he is breathing, as well as my boyfriend...and other others, i feel like if i get to be close friends with someone they are going to die on me too....I don't have any friends but one that i just met and i am starting to draw back from hanging out with her so much too. I don't know... I am looking for advice becuase my psychologist says we need to deal with my childhood before we move into that and I need to deal with this now, i have been dealing with my childhood my whole life, this is only 5 years now in April.

</font color=purple> All I can do is try becuase there is no reason to hope. </font color=orange> Learn from your expierences and teach others whta you learned....it may help them when they think there is no help left.