OMG__ Thank you Care Taker--- Like I tried to post a thread about anger to get some help-- and I think this may help- What a wonderful idea!
I never see myself as angry person but truth be told, I am a lot-
.. may it get better in time.
***********************************************************
I right now am stressing, and having anger with my boyfriend and his sister.
His sister said she would get the paper work I need for the car, for Court on Thursday. My Boyfriend said he would be the one contacting his sister so he could receive the fax..... NOTHING IS GOING ON AS FAR AS I KNOW---I keep getting told NOW the last 2 days-- Oh she will do it--
I go to Court Thursday- meaning I have one more sleep before I go to court (I work Nights).
I feel let down, that is coupled by anger..... I sometimes twist those two together at times. It is like my expectations are let down.
I was getting so angry that I thought I would just burst out to my boyfriend and tell him if this does not work out- then it is something i can not let go. (Which maybe true with unable to let go- I see this as not only being lied to but also let down-- More so his sister lied cuz OVER a month ago she said she would get this to me- Then she turned around and said she wouldn't be, then she said she would again---and she has waited till the dead line basically- I am beginning to think it is all lies with her and she just doesn't want their parents mad about it- cuz she has been telling everyone it was always insured)....
Resolution for the time being:::
I need to take a deep breath in- I am at work- this anger which came upon while my boyfriend was driving me here, is not right here.... I also already expressed the silent treatment and snotty attitude to my boyfriend which is uncalled for but it just happens some times... (Something to work on)
I need to remember that COURT has not happened YET- it will be on Thursday---
And that She (Boyfriend's Sister) Still has time to Prove good Old Beauflow wrong with thinking this is a lie from her. And That is another thing- I don't know if it is a lie or not- I just feel thrown to the wolves right now.... and i need to sooth myself of that feeling.
And
If I am let down with this all-- It will have to be something that of: I cross that bridge when I come to it.
The expectation of these two to help me was too high.
As T told me- I should had just called the Insurance Co- but His Sister Told me I could not do that.
And remember it is not end of the world-- It is just money right- money that I do not have and with just a little help with some paper work, it would had been lesser but whatever!
Also I know I am to blame for part of this--- I need to take some responsibility which I am- The Car is now insured, My Boyfriend and I have set up something so we both pay on it and for it to be insured. I basically already told my Boyfriend I thought she may be was lying about the insurance when she changed her mind on getting the paper work to us, and I basically said we need to get it and if you don't I will.
I also have not done a repeat with how I drove in the fog that night of the accident- learned my lesson there.
I wish I had enough money to just get my own car.... but I don't. I have offered to take buses but with the winter there is fear of me falling again and hurting my back so, it is like a toss up coin.
And I need to remember-- No matter how angry I get - My Boyfriend does love me... (I had thoughts of leaving and even sui thoughts if they let me down with this)... I was thinking I am not part of his family if he lets me down with this-- but see that is the thing, He is not the one totally letting me down - It would be his sister really.
And really- whatever if his sister does- it is not like we see her all the time and ya know- I think she should be well aware of how I would be feeling right now.
Thanks all- I hope that was constructive!