(((Sallygolightly)) - when I read your post, I was amazed at what a beautiful soul you are....how unselfish and loving you are to your husband. You're right, he needs to find these answers himself and having him deny his desires wouldn't be the answer. I agree you both need some professional guidance through this. Giving him the gift of friendship even if he pursues this is a wonderful and difficult gesture. I don't see you as a fool who being taken advantage of - you're handling this with dignity and compassion but do get some professional guidance. I wish you the best on life.