I have a hard time asking for help of any kind. I was told and told over again to hide my feelings and don't go around asking for help. So I rarely do ask unless that I know my life is in danger and that I can't go further without help.

Well this lady she did help me without me asking for it. I did appreciated it and I still do appreciated it. But my problem is now, she says lies about me. Saying that I have begged her over and over again for her help, that she has passed many hours and many nights with me, finding things for me to help me out and that she is so tired, that I have completelly drained her. That if, she has known that I would asked her all the time for help, she wouldn't have give it to me.

Well that lady what she did for me was sent me 3 cards and 2 email messages saying she was hoping I was ok and that she was thinking about me. I do appreciate her caring for me by sending me 3 cards and 2 messages which I didn't even asked for. So it was nice of her. What I can't deal with is her lies. And how do I know she has lied about it? Because I read her email she has sent to someone else about it and that person sent it to me to protect me. So I think she is a better friend!

As I said I already have a hard time asking for help and I always feel bad when I do so why is she saying she have giving so much more then she did to the point I have drained her. I don't mind she says to people she has help me but why lie about it. And I have the feeling she regrets what she has giving me. I never regret what I give and I don't expect anything in return.

I'm sorry I know I keep talking about it and this post is long. I have also trust issues and poeple who say lies, I have a real hard time taking that and dealing with it. I know that this is going to affect me in a way I will now have even a harder time asking for help. I will probably stay in that hole and eat pizza and chocolat.

Thank you for reading this. Sorry it is so long.
nightdream