Sweetie, you have to let him go. You are walking on egg shells with him and that's not healthy.

Never pay him for anything again. You are being treated very badly here and he is very toxic to you, and very controlling.

I understand that you care for him very much, but you are not showing any pride here. Be proud of yourself and don't chase losers like he is.

FORGET HIM AND JUST LET HIM GO, PLEASE!!!

I hate the fact that you are going against your little voice telling you that you really shouldn't be doing what you're doing. Never go against that little voice or gut feeling because it will just make yourself sick.

He is 100% toxic to you, and I really hope you can find some pride and take care of YOU!!!