The not-getting-enough banter when drunk with guy friends sounds like it is not about you, personally, and I would try to learn to differentiate between that and truly personal things.

No matter what is said, an actual relationship is wholly personal and cannot be conveyed to another. If a friend or loved one tells others "about" you, that is not you in actuality in that relationship because the others are not there, are just hearing a story and, since it is allegedly about you, they are not hearing it from you so it is not even your story; you are not what other people say about you!

Other people talking is always about them. What another says is their opinion or viewpoint. If a guy says he is not getting enough, that is about the guy and his inability to love a woman in a way that leaves him satisfied, not about the woman and what she is doing.

But I do know what you mean about feeling talk of you is spread around outside of the relationship and I would talk to your husband and work with him to get him to stop that bad habit of his, solely because you do not wish yourself and your marriage to be talked about. That is not an unreasonable request and I would make sure your husband knows you would like him to stop talking about you and he with his buddies. However, he can still talk about himself; he is "allowed" to talk about himself all day long and not getting enough. . . that's about him; just teach him the difference between his not getting enough and your not giving enough and let him know he can talk about his problems to whomever he pleases but not about you and how he feels about you, except to you.