i am so worried about going over that my eyes are always on the clock. i beat her to it every time, because i don't ever want to hear her say 'we have to stop.' i think i would take it personally, and think she doesn't really care about me, so i pretend she would never say that, but actually i never let it get to that point to know for sure

ha, funny thing... as i'm writing this, i see the connection to other areas of my life, i.e. dating. i "reject" other people first so that they can't "reject" me... hmmm...

along the same lines, i've noticed (with green envy) that my t walks out the person before me all the way down the hall to the front door of the building, laughing and talking the whole way. she's never walked me out are there any good reasons why she'd walk people out and not others? or, a reason at least that doesn't make me think she likes everyone better than me? she doesn't even get up out of her chair when i leave... any thoughts?