Ack, I had this exact same issue! I dealt with it by being very analytical and talking 'about myself', almost from an outside point of view. It must have been very strange for someone to sit there watching me smile like a normal person while talking about suicide. Unfortunately, I had a t who didn't catch on well to this being an act that I just didn't know how to turn off, and she tended to feed into it rather than actually addressing my issues. I get why she did it and what she was thinking, but I probably should have explained myself a bit better.

I can also identify with what some of the above posters have mentioned regarding 'having to keep it a secret' and learning how out of necessity. I lied like mad at my school, because I saw what happened to kids who didn't. Our pediatric mental institute was extremely bad and I knew I would not only ruin my life but that of my family if I was put there. I also knew what tended to happen to kids in the foster care program and felt I was better off at home where I knew how things usually worked. It was also just ingrained in me as a child to 'keep your head down and your mouth shut,' so I think that has a lot to do with it as well. It's a lot to work your way back from and that takes time.