Wow Silver! I'm relating to so much of what you have written. I am trying to learn to identify the emotions I am feeling. Sometimes I don't even know what it is. I need to be much more assertive too. I am starting to work on some of this in therapy, but it is a slow process for me.

I just lost my best friend of 10 years. I did everything I could to fix the situation that began because of me. My apologies and attempts to fix things didn't work so I now have to try to move on, but it seems especially hard right now at Christmas.