Xtree - you sound like you are a loving and caring friend.

The view from where I sit - still drinking even though I know I need help...

No matter how much you are hurting and hoping you can help your friend, it is wasted energy until she is ready to receive the help. Be there for her as a friend.

If you want to send a greeting - keep it at just the first 4 lines you wrote:

"To you and all your family a very christmas my friend
May all your days be happy with a joy that never ends
May peace and love surround you
At Christmas time and all the whole year through"

Perhaps your friend is not like me - but anytime someone tells me that they won't judge or abandon me or they will be here for me...etc. I go into total defensive mode and put the brick wall up.

We just aren't ready until we are ready.