Ashlees, I agree with Leed and cant explain. It is very important that you find your way to a counselor or therapist. Do you go to church? Could your pastor help? Look in your phonebook under community services - alot of times you can find free counseling services. I work as a counselor (free) for women in crisis in my county - everything from rape to domestic violence. Ive counselled women and teenagers who have been the victims of abuse. So the resources are there if you look for them.

It is really important that you talk to someone about this. I recently talked to someone who was 60 and she said I was the first person she told (it happend to her as a child. Thats a burden too heavy to carry for so many years, not to mention the unnecessary shame. Once you start talking to someone about what happened, the shame and feelings of heaviness will start to lift, and you will be able to enjoy life again.

Most important of all, please remember that what happened was not your fault. You did nothing to cause it - you did not ask to be molested. You may FEEL different because of what happened, and yes a part of you has changed because of the molestation, but you are still a valuable human being.

I check these posts daily so feel free to leave a reply if I can help further. Good luck!