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Thanks all for the hugs and replies. I have so much going on, everything is hitting the fan all at once. I want to fall back in to old ways to ask for help. If I do it moderately, by simply asking for help, it will be ignored or dismissed. I feel like I need to yell so loud for others to hear me. I don't know anymore, I just don't know.
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Lauru-------------That's me, Bipolar and Watching TV 
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
---Robert Frost
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