not too long ago i realized that I will never look the way i want to if i eat. the only way i keep weight off is if i barely eat anything, the moment i do actually eat a meal i feel like i gained twenty pounds. i used to really enjoy food, but now i dread going to lunch at school bc i have to eat something or else people talk. if it wasn't necessary to eat to survive i would be completely fine giving up food for the rest of my life. i'll look at my cake but i wont eat it too. so whats the point of living if i cant enjoy food and not worry about how i look?