Quote:
Originally Posted by SallyBrown
Ah, Peaches, it's ok. You weren't being selfish, you were being a CLIENT. I'm guessing you don't usually invest this much in making your feelings known, so what you did was part of good therapy.
It's ok that you forgot about this -- you have to avoid being overly concerned with T's personal feelings, as a rule. But perhaps this can give you some potential insight as to why she might be replying in a very by-the-book way -- she might be overwhelmed. Her not replying may simply be because she'd rather talk about this all in person.
From where I sit, this new information makes me think your sharing an "I love you" with her, truly a special gift even if not fully acknowledge as such, comes at a very good time.  |
Hi Sally Brown,
Thanks for replying. Actually, I think I "DO" make too much effort to express my feelings to my t. I think not being able to share my feelings as a kid -- and not having friends to talk to in real life - has made me desperate to share how i feel with somebody who cares and will listen and understand. I've been hoping it's OK to do this. . .it feels like things have been stuffed down for so long, and there's so much still in there. . .
I hope my t was touched by my saying the child part of me loved her. I've come to realize that she doesn't discourage the attachment - she just doesn't readily share her own reactions.
I think you are right, that she does get overwhelmed. Her supervisor changed a couple of years back, and he requires much more documentation on the computer. She's had to take on more clients and work longer hours. She's retirement age, and has recently cut her hours down and switched from a full time employee to a part-time contract therapist where she works. I think she wants to retire fully, but she said she wanted to continue with some of her clients -- I'm guessing the ones who aren't ready to be on their own yet (including me). I guess if she didn't care, she would have just retired.
I know i probably worry too much about her feelings. I know therapy is supposed to be about my feelings. But she means so much to me, and i don't want to hurt/bother/frustrate her.