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Dec 22, 2011, 01:00 PM
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Member Since: Nov 2011
Posts: 294
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dusty9838
I figured I'd respond to your post and give you a mans point of view so I hope this helps somewhat.
If you have had problems with previous men in your relationships it's probably because you were with the wrong guys to start with. If a guy can't handle your 'roller coaster' emotions then he just isn't the best match for you. It isn't that you have a "stay away" radar on  but for MOST guys that have no children they are usually wary of getting into a relationship with a woman that has a child already usually because they are scared. I think you should date a guy and get to know him and take it slow and let him get to know you, then once you feel confident with him you should introduce your baby to him and again take it slow and make sure you find the right person.
The last thing you want to do is rush everything just to "have" some guy that isn't the best match for you and your baby and end up regretting it years into the future.
I hope everything works out for you, take care.  |
***Waves*** Hi Dusty....I think that this is good advice...Don't be hard on yourself...Sounds like you were either with the wrong type of guys (since they couldn't handle some of the things that make you YOU) or it just wasn't the right time...And you have to look at it from a stand point that you have a child...SOME people view this as baggage...I hate the word "baggage" when it comes to kids...I'm a mom, and if I were single and dating, a dude could kick rocks if he didn't want me because I have a child...Either you take all of me or nothing...Having a child can scare men off....And that's not said to discourage you...I actually think this is a good thing...If a guy accepts you, child or not, that shows you that is he really in it for the right reason...
Be selective when it comes to mates...Do not settle just because you don't want to be alone...You don't want just anyone around your child....
Be patient...It (relationship) will happen...And I reeealllly hate to use this saying but I will...He will come when you least expect...It's true...When I stopped stressing and looking, and just focused on me, THAT'S when it happened....That's when I met Him...Stay focused and determined..The right one will see your positive qualities, and even deal with your moods...It's possible for it to work...Good luck!
Edit: And don't feel bad...It does seem like it's more of the norm for guys to be "bachelors" or not looking to settle down..Even the older ones....Well, I shouldn't say "norm"...But I have noticed, when I go out, that alot of times it seems like no one is looking for something real...But there are some good ones out there....
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Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, & Wisdom to know the difference.
To live is to suffer, and to survive is to find meaning in that suffering
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