Good input, thank you both.

Right now I leave work 2 1/2 hours early because my T's last appt is at 3:30 and his office is half an hour away from my workplace.

Perhaps I need to find a T closer to my work or ideally someone who has an open slot after-hours. A shorter commute would give me more flexibility with the times I could go. Although I had one early-morning appointment and I totally shut down and went numb for the remainder of the day. So I'm a bit scared to try mornings again. I presume it was some sort of coping mechanism to try and "de-therapy" myself so that I could function. Didn't work.

The thing I find really interesting is I feel like there is absolutely NO WAY I could ask my current T to schedule 2 sessions for me at once. It's one of the most pronounced examples I've run into where I feel like I can not ask for anything that is not pre-offered to me. I am absolutely TERRIFIED of asking for something and being told that someone can't help me. Fascinating and disturbing at the same time.