Hi Roadrunnerbeepbeep.... I did read your entire post..what a post!.... There are so many areas that you covered, I'm not sure where to start. Sorry about the situations with your jobs, "ish" and having to move. The advice I'm about to give you can either be well received or hated. I hope you receive it. I heard you mention a couple times in your post the word "Lord"....what i have learned (by experience) is that when everything seem to be falling down around you (us) it's Gods way of trying to get our attention, you mentioned a few times in you post that you choose to love in spite of the mistreatment that you receive from others...and this is a wonderful state of mind to have ... but... is any of that Love being directed towards God? your Creator, Sustainer..... sometimes/ manytimes the afflictions that we experience in life is (though we seldom see this while we're in it) it's the loving hand of our Father, whipping his children to turn to him ... the following writing is by Thomas Brooks
When He shows no anger!
"The Lord disciplines the one He loves, and
punishes every son whom He receives." Heb. 12:6
There cannot be a greater evidence of God's
hatred and wrath--than His
refusing to correct
men for their sinful courses and vanities!
Where God refuses to correct--there God resolves
to destroy! There is no man so near God's axe--so
near the flames--so near hell--as he whom God
will not so much as spend a rod upon!
"Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline."
Revelation 3:19
God is most angry--when He shows no anger!
Who can seriously meditate upon this, and not
be silent under God's most smarting rod?
This season that you're in, where everything seem to be falling apart, may be exactly where God wants you to be so that He can demonstrate his graces to you, HIS LOVE TO YOU...but that can only happen if you turn to Him. I hope my response didn't sound harsh in any way (that was not my intention)...I say this to you in love. I wish you peace of mind in this Christmas season and the new year.
n. morgan
www.keeptrustingGod.com
