Thanks for your advice! Well no there was nothing going on with us.
The first guy did hit on me. He then said he had a girlfriend, so I stopped expecting anything but he went on flirting. I flirted as well but there was never an intention to go further given the circumstances. Very recently he became very ambiguous, saying that it was "too hard to brake up" (so he had actually thought about it!). I didn't know what to say. He then stated clearly that he had no interest in me, that if the relationship broke up he wanted to have fun etc... When I said he displayed a lot of bad faith, he said 'true" and that he could take criticism. I was puzzled by this and wrote him a card explaining that I didn't expect anything from a man with a girlfriend and that I was glad we had talked about it again. When I saw him again he went into a rage, saying that I had implied that he was interested, that my words were ambiguous etc... I just thought that my words were too close to home and that he was getting nervous his girlfriend might find out that he had some interest in me. From this point I rarely spoke of him if at all in public, only innocent things actually, but he got angry and talked about me. So I asked him to stop and once again he went mad. I stopped seing him altogether but he goes on talking about me.

His friend seemed very interested in me. I met him shortly after having learned that the first one had a girlfriend. His cousin told me he was single, which wasn't true. I didn't find out right away, but I don't think that was the real problem anyway. He behaved with me as though he cared, he was jealous of my flrting with his friend, but he didn't act on it. When I asked him to tell me what he wanted, he denied having ever stated any interest in me. As soon as he said that he started hitting on me again. I suspect that he was interested but something in my character bothered him. The girl he went with accepted to see him once in a while, never really criticized him, accepted to be a nobody (none of his friends knew about her!!), finally she dumped him. He said that it was normal she had dumped him, but he wouldn't change a thing for nobody.
I told him all I expected was being treated in a decent and consistant manner and that this was not too much to expect from a friend. I said I didn't force him of course, that it was up to him and that we were probably both responsible. He told me I was "masochistic" and "the worst thing he ever met" !!!!!! We never had any relationship!!! I would have understood that he was angry at being criticized, especially since it was deserved (and I don't think I was unfair or agressive), but to overreact like that!!!!

Finallly the third guy had a really weird reaction. He seemed to admire me, wanted to know a lot of things from me, but at the same time he suggested I had a weird personality. He ignored me several times but when I talked to him he seemed overjoyed to see me. Last week he seemed genuinely happy to see me but suddenly he went away without explanation, didn't talk to me the whole evening and flirted with every available girl. I couldn't figure out if he couldn't stand me or if he liked me. Can you imagine what a weird situation ?
I decided not to bother if possible. Yesterday I saw him again with a girl who seemed to claim some ownership rights on him (he is reportedly single but she seems to want him, he didn't seem to encourage nor discourage her, but maybe he is interested in her after all) and nobody in his group would talk to me. These people had been very friendly to me a very short while ago.
So I suppose somebody must have talked about me again, saying I was being nosy when all I did was show interest. Whatever I say is proof that I am trying to control everybody or trying to ruin somebody's reputation, which I have never done. Some people clearly dislike me and twist everything I say around, but aren't the others responsible for believing all too easily what is being said ?
What exactly am I responsible of doing ? Being too friendly ? too open ? too critical ? expecting too much in friendship and love ?
Some said I was too "radical" for rejecting one night stands (suggesting I was only after marriage, as if there was nothing in between), to "gloomy" when I talked about serious issues, "paranoïd" when I made twice the same joke about a man hitting on my married sister. Basically I have the feeling I am being seen as a party spoiler, preacher and gossipy person. I can't win. I don't see myself like that at all. I have always tried to work things out with everybody, but to no avail with them. It seems the problem is I am not accepting everything. I am a party spoiler after all.

I am very puzzled. Other people said the same things about my serious, "radical" personality but they either liked it or still wanted to be friends with me or at least were not so ambiguous about it. Some said I was very open and that it was bewildering but that once you got to know me, you realized it was just friendliness and interest in others. So why can some get to know me and others not ? Maybe the problem lies somewhere else ? Is it just an excuse ?

I am tired of complaining but also tired of meeting people who seem to admire me, being really interested in me, attracted, who worry about me and then suddenly reject me or even at the same time for the very reasons they were attracted in the first place. They become extremely agressive when simple rejection would have done the trick. They seem to just want me to go away. Now. Forever. But not really.