AlwaysSearching,

I have a similar situation too. I took piano from the time I was 5 years old. In Junior High, I decided to take up the flute. Then came college. What to major in.....the only thing I knew I was even good at was music. I was also good at other things & was pretty much able to do anything I wanted to do (except for struggling with calculus). Sooooo, I decided to major in music......focusing on performance with my flute. I graduated with my AA in music & went on to the University that had a wonderful music department. I even bought myself a wonder professional flute so I wouldn't have any excuse that my instrument was holding me back. The first semester, I spent 8 hours a day practicing....finding that I hit a plateau. I realized that no matter how much I practiced, I would never get to the point where I would be able to be in a professional symphony orchestra......being a school music teacher was the only thing I would ever be & that just wasn't for me. I changed my major to Computer Science & accounting. Graduating with a 3.25 GPA in that & had a wonderful job offer right out of school. I realized I could be good at what ever I wanted. I continued playing my flute at churches, & then found a local flute choir that I joined. There were a few of us that decided to put together a professional flute quartet & played for some local gatherings, weddings, & other things. During that time, I enjoyed the challanges of being an aerospace engineer also.

I point I am trying to make is that sometimes we do hit a plateau.....that doesn't mean that we have lost our talents, but there can be a level that our profeciency stays at no matter how hard we try to force it. That doesn't mean that we can't enjoy our talents at the level that we are good at.....but there are always going to be people who are better than we are....that doesn't mean that we should give up doing what we like to do. At this point in my life, I don't have time to play my flute. I know it will be harder going back to it after being away, but plan on doing it when my life settles down. Not only that, but I have horses & show dressage. I was improving constantly just 6 months ago, but with trying to pack up 2 homes to move, I don't have time for that either.

I have a list of all the things that I am good at & enjoy doing......(even though I will never be excellent in some of the things & there will be many people better than I).....I am looking for a place where I will be able to get back into the things on my list. (dressage training for me & my horses, playing my flute, ballroom dancing......& several other things I am good at doing).

If you enjoy drawing, do what you like to do....I have found that when I push my talent, that is when I end up not liking it.......when I just do it, that is when I enjoy it.....without worring what other people think of what I am doing or how good I am.

Hope you can find the right place in your life where you can enjoy what you are good at without pushing yourself.
Debbie