Hey thanks guys. I didn't really expect anyone to read my dribble. It feels so good to have some people out there who I can talk to. I've been feeling so overwhelmed. Like so very overwhelmed and scared about how long all this is gona last. I don't ever want to have to go back to hospital. I want to be normal and i want to get on with life in a healthy way- if dats possible. I don't think i have such great help for the problems i have- like i haven't seen my psychologist/psychiatrist in ages!!! I'm not in a very good way at all!!! You guys just talking to me and responding made me feel bit betta- so thanks for the love. i hope the future gets brighter for everyone!!!