Interesting. I wonder what it would be like to go to a T that was obviously not "all together", in the facts of her life or obviously disorganized/stressed/etc. I would doubt the ability of that person to help me, and wouldn't feel comfortable opening up to her.

In my experience, people who have their lives in a good space have often worked really hard to get there, as in gone through the stuff that it takes. That they have had challenges, sometimes much more formidable than I've ever faced, but they've put themselves back together. That's what I imagine my "together" T has done with his life.

But we don't really know what our T's have gone through in order to get where they are, or, of course, they may be faking their togetherness as part of their T persona.

It seems to me that this would be a really good issue to raise with your T, especially since it seems like it's a bit of a block for you.

Anne