lido,

I have a long history of using this technique as well. I have hesitatingly opened myself more to the last two men that I've been with (first one: married for 14 years; the second: been together for 2 years) ~ but I've never been able to completely trust anyone.

Very low self-esteem/self-hate is my core issue. The trick for you, is to determine what the core issue is for you. From there, you can work on overcoming the issue to finally be able to trust men. For instance, do you trust women? Do you like yourself? Are you able to have healthy friendships with men and women? Just a few Q's to think about.