About a year ago, I spoke these words "Once you get to know me, you'll run".

I said them to my T. Never said them before. Over the next 12 months, it would appear that it takes about 1 - 2 months to get to know me. If you're really, really patient - you might stick around a little longer, thinking there's some potential. After all, that first month with me was just so intoxicatingly fun. We read each other's minds. We finished each other's sentences. We communicated effortlessly. We had so much in common. Where did that person go?

Maybe...I discovered your flaws. They scare me. You have too many secrets. There's something you're not telling me. You want inside my head, but you won't let me in yours. You don't do what you say you're going to do. You're not nice to your dogs. You got rough with my kid. I'm always the one calling you. Doubts and more doubts. I bring these things up. You dismiss or stonewall. OK, I think that's where I checked out. But I stay with you. Why? 'Cause I don't want to be alone? We get along in so many other ways? Nobody's perfect? I can't do any better? I don't know. You know my flaws now too. Nope, I'm not perfect. Far from. In fact, I'm not even the same person you met anymore. You've seen the dark side of me. I'm back to broken, beyond repair. I can barely talk to you anymore. You don't want to get sucked into my nightmare. I don't blame you. Why are you still with me? What keeps you here? Now I'm getting paranoid. What do you want? I'm afraid you're going to do X, Y and Z, like the last guy. No, I'm not attacking you, please just prove to me in actions, not in words that you are different.

And you disappear.

Then the cycle repeats. Different flaws, same pattern. 1)I come alive, 2)I slowly die, 3)I'm dead, 4)you're gone. And my T? We're at number 3. What's next?