I think this one sentence sums up the real root of what went wrong with this conversation.

It's a fundamental difference of how men and women communicate. You want to be heard and understood. His natural inclination is to try to fix things. You didn't want anything fixed, you just wanted to be understood and validated. So no matter what came out of his mouth next, if it wasn't what you needed at that moment (to be heard), then it wasn't going to be received well. And there is no judgement here - your needs at the time simply didn't match what he was capable of giving then.

This is of course separate from what he actually said and whatever his perceptions of his relevant experience may be. It's just another element of the basis of the conversation to be considered.

If it's any consolation, my husband doesn't get it either. It's just not how most guys are wired. Not to say that there aren't men who do get it, it just hasn't been my experience.