(((((Trippin)))))
I'm so sorry you're still so very unhappy! But maybe I can get a laugh out of you when I tell you why I bother. It's because ... Wait for it ...

I'm an alcoholic! And I went to AA! Yippee!

I learned the secret to my occasional wondering about whether I wanted to go on living when AA taught me to Live one day at a time.

Until then, I imagined that what I was enduring now I'd have to endure forever. AA made me understand that that wasn't true. I could know nothing beyond this moment. I learned to Live in the present.

It took a lot a work, and a great therapist to help me, but eventually I learned to stay in the present when panic grabbed at me. It was silly to get caught up in what had happened--that was over. It was useless to project into what might happen--that was science fiction.

By living one day at a time, I can handle pretty much anything. I might be losing my health insurance, but I haven't yet. Today I have it. Whatever happens, I can deal with today. I can hold on that long.

If I can't, I'll break things down to an hour. These are my rules. I can change them. I will hang on one more hour.

Why do I bother? Because I can. It is my right. It is my choice.

When you toss off questions like what's the fuss? & why bother?, Trippin2, I wonder whether you realize that this IS your life--you make the rules. It IS your life--you are in charge. Make a HUGE fuss!

These folks who bug us wanting us to be happy all the time ... You know they aren't. They just aren't unhappy as much or as deeply. You may not want to chance it, but I bug them back some times. Nobody is happy all the time.

This reminds me of a thread someone started about whether we'd take a pill to be hypomanic all the time. Venus pointed out wisely the downfall inherent in that.

Roadrunner