First off Caritytoo a safe hug for you

I have been working on my healing for a long time and I can tell you why MayBe some of your parts are wanting to hurt you.

Are you allowing them to come out with your system rules? Are they young or older? Think about your question as if maybe it were directed at me or even you feeling the way that alter feels. Getting down to what is making that alter want to hurt you. Is this alter angry and your the first thing they see. It is safe inside to be angry as you may have learned that coming out turned out to be about hurtful things.

Do the opposite, If you feel like hitting yourself, journal about how you want to hit those that hurt you, you won't go to jail unless you do. but were not thinking about that right now.
Have you thought about getting a toy, a color book w/crayons, your journal causes it sounds like the alter wants to be known and alters will keep you up at night, they will cause mass chaotic problems becasue they are not geting what they NEED inside. Reaching out to your "problem alters" is saying I hear you and you agree and thanking them for keeping you alive.

I hope this helps and isn't too long. I wish you peace and healing. I am here if you need an ear or 2. Adelissa Crew

have a safe and nice Crew