This is gonna be fun. I like when you respond, hankster, because you always make me think! I'm going to address each issue separately here.

I am not diagnosing myself; I have been diagnosed OCD by two therapists, two pdocs, and my GP. My T's approach is a blend of logic and feelings. She talks a lot about making choices, based on both. She really doesn't focus on feelings toward external influences, she directs me to my feelings about me. It appears she doesn't want me to care about the opinions of others at all.

This is my third round of therapy, each for different issues. I believe that this round, although it may take a year or two, will end just as naturally as the other two. Both of my past terminations were handled appropriately by both me and the therapist. I have faith in current T to do the same. She seems to have my best interest at heart and attempts to remain partial.

Most importantly, I know that the work I do is important. My clients, employees, coworkers, and boss also let me know that all the time. My family is very proud of my career. T remains insistent that we are equals, no matter the education level. I got my B.A. in psychology because my original career path was to be a therapist, but let's just say things worked exactly like they were supposed to! When I told her that was my original plan and was thinking about going for it following this round of therapy, she gave me the following advice:
Positive:
1. It's a very rewarding job.
2. Pleasure of helping people heal.
3. T knows she's "called" to do the work.
4. She said she'd help me in anyway she could if I felt "called" to do it.
Negative:
1. She's still paying off student loans 6 years post-graduation. My own research shows it would probably cost $25,000 for me to obtain a master's degree.
2. I make almost as much money as a program director as she does as a therapist.
3. She has to purchase her own insurance (mine is provided through my company...free) and rent her office.
4. There's no such thing as sick or vacation time (so all that time out dealing with cancer has probably sucked @ss financially). Don't work, don't get paid.
5. It is very hard work to be really good at it.
So, she's not trying to sway me either way. She's giving a realistic perspective of a possible life choice I have been interested in since college.

If she rejects me, most likely it's due to a predetermined boundary because she has told me she truly likes and loves me. That doesn't tell me I'm not good enough; it tells me I have a T who has made choices for herself based on her own healthy boundaries based on her ethics. Her boundaries are her choice. She's teaching me in regard to situations in my life wherein someone "rejected" me that most of the time, the choices of others have absolutely nothing to do with me. It has to do with them and what they could/couldn't do at the time. It absolves both myself and others of blame. The longer I think about that, the more it actually makes sense.

IMO, dual relationships shouldn't be engaged in while therapy is ongoing because of the bias it creates on both sides. The client may become afraid of losing the friendship due to something they tell the T about themselves that might cause the friendship to rupture. Similarly, The T may become hesitant to tell the client a difficult truth the client needs to hear to heal. It becomes about the reciprocal relationship and takes the authenticity out of the therapeutic relationship, which is necessary for the client to heal. Once the therapy process is over, I don't think there's anything wrong with a dual relationship between certain therapists/clients who can handle a role change, but therapists are bombarded with information that most of the time, dual relationships do not work. I don't know if that is true or not, but if you do a thorough internet search, there is very little information about successful post-therapy dual relationships and they seem to be frowned upon.

So, what it all comes down to based on my logic and feelings is this: although I may be disappointed if she says no, her decision really has nothing to do with me. It has to do with her and I cannot control her; she owns her own decisions. I would feel the same about anyone else in my life. Through my work with T, I already have a healthier perspective of rejection. I have already healed that much...and that is exciting for me to realize!!