As long as I don't zone out while driving, I'll be okay. Exercise helps... but the gym has limited hours this week, which doesn't help. I will be driving for 45 min one way and then working, and then driving back home. The driving scares me, so I will be calling a friend, using my blue tooth for my phone.

I got some additional work hours,I just hope it's enough of a distraction. I still want pain. I still want to do something that will help, I should be helping myself, instead, I am working, and being there for my sister. But I don't have time to get help for myself. and I honestly hate that part. I'm starting to want to get help, but I have things I need to get done.... like working for money to pay rent.

At this time I am trying to make part of my life like being there in the hospital, but without being there. Like working on puzzles, reading, therapy (by myself), learning more skills through DBT.... I just hope things improve... and exercise continues to help... it's the only thing I enjoy right now.