Everyone has good advice here. But I really think that you should look into finding a good therapist, preferably one that specializes in Cognitive Behavioral therapy. You need to learn how to communicate your feelings better. As you are describing here, you know that you end up saying the wrong things. What your admitting is that you speak with your emotions verses logic and constructive communication skills. Your not stupid or a failure you know, you just need to learn the right communication skills and that will really help you learn to control your anger. If you learn to communicate better your boyfriend will learn to react better as well.

(((((Hugs)))))
Open Eyes