Our T is gone for a family emergency--taking care of a very ill relative. She calls us every week and emails sometimes, but its not the same as having her home. So I have this sub T-- he is someone I chose because a friend knows him and says he's really safe and good. And yes, absolutely just because he does "different" doesn't mean its detrimental--thats a good point.
His philosophies of treating DID are just different-- likes integrations, wants us all to talk to each other (not bad thing, but its not how we work), his ways of talking to the kids are very different, he only wants "one person" speaking for everyone else. Things like that. Again, not bad at all-- however we've tried those things, and it didn't ever work for us. Our T .... gosh I am not sure how to describe--but she has the same views of DID as we do-- we don't have to tell each other everything if it doesn't seem like its time to, she will keep each alter's secrets for them if they don't want to tell someone inside, she talks to the kids as one would talk to kids which is so validating for them. He keeps insisting we need to find the "real" person (we're all real!!) and have her come out and take over...which totally didn't work and we don't need it to work, because I handle things ever since the "real" (groan) person disappeared several years ago. And we don't view DID as a "disease" or something bad... its just a creative coping mechanism that we used to deal with life-- we are ok with having DID. Our T is the same way--its not bad to have DID. Its little things like that, I think, that are just a little bothersome.