do you have a teacher or school counselor you can talk to? it's been so long since I've been in school so I don't know how it works, but there must be an adult at your school you can talk to, especially if your grades are suffering. I think schools are much more sensitive to issues nowadays so you have that in your favour.

btw, you're not pathetic. it sounds like your mom has no coping skills and she'd rather just shut down the conversation with an insult rather than dealing with the real issue.

please keep us posted with what you figure out!