Hi a beautifilmind.

I hear some good and some less than good things in your post.

I get this feeling your are pushing yourself too hard to reach your goals. I'm not saying you should quit your activities and studying, but be sure to take enough brakes and get enough sleep. In the long run you run the risk of mentally exhausting yourself.

Secondly, you sound a little too suspicious of other people. They often say that to succeed in life it's all about who you know in life. I honestly don't think other people want you to fail. They probably don't care that much, perhaps a handful do care. (If people like you, they want you to succeed even). Pushing people away is not the answer; it could be a form of self-sabotage.

But it's great that you have aspirations and goals. You don't have to throw them away and I don't think your friends want this either. But I think they are a little worried by the way you go after you goals. Criticism of people around you is often/sometimes right, and it's not a way to undermine your actions to succeed.