I have also integrated slowly and gently at my own pace in my own way. I am glad it has happened this way. One day I realized a bunch of people were missing and were "me". It was really cool.
I was slightly off balance for a few days once I realized it. But that was only because I became aware of it.
I have had some of my people get upset that others were integrating, they all accepted it eventually.
I still have some people who have not chosen to integrate. That is fine with me. None of us care anymore.
Good Luck and take care of all of you.