i am feeling horrible right now. i went on another site to make an account, but i was denied because i am too young. i feel so stupid for doing that. two sites should and are enough. i guess it's because i want to feel like i can make a differernce in many people's lives. the administrator said it wasn't personal, but even though i know she meant it, part of me won't accept it. now all i want to do is wait until my mom leaves and then go into my room, get out my sharp razor or a new one and cut until i feel no emotions. i know realize that i am pretty much worthless and i don't deserve all the good that is coming to me. if only i was physically stronger...

i don't think i should talk to anyone outside of these sites and my therapist because if i don't put myself out there then i can't be rejected and i won't have to feel terrible again. maybe i should just keep my mouth shut and not try to be more extroverted, maybe it will save me some pain.
thoughts?

Sam