My heart goes out to you'
In my case my mothers father was an abusive alcoholic and my mother at 14, scared, told him she had been raped (not true), my real father went to jail and my real mother left quebec to Onatario to get away from her father.... she wanted to keep me... she married a stranger in ontario and the abuse was from him....phys., sexu., etc.....my real mom it was neglect...
I think she was just too young...
anyways, my real mom was disowned by her family also.... when I met her a few yrs back she refered to herself as "the black sheep of the family"...that is how I feel now with my adoptive family.
Guilt is a powerful thing that I know alot about and work on constantly,
Wishing you the very best,
Patricia