I am in such a <font color="purple">
GOOD</font> mood tonight! I am soooooooooo <font color="red">
HAPPY</font>! I feel like I have a new lease on life...I feel *Motivated*...I want *Everybody* to know it!
I had a doctor appointment today. I went in feeling scared and hesitant. I almost cancelled the appointment. I had been putting it off for a very long time. I had been living in *secret* with a heart problem that I first noticed in the summer of 2002. I started to have chest pain, severe palpitations, etc when I would exercise, or doing some type of physical activity like that. I went into the doctor once back then, but my primary doc wasn't available. Evidently due to the nature of the problem, all that doc could do was to make sure that I was alive. He said that I'd have to make another appointment to see my primary doc for further evaluation/treatment. Well, I was thought that was a waste of my time and nobody said anything on the way out about making another appointment, so I left. Anyway, a new primary doc later, I finally (very nervously) made the appointment with a primary doc after some recent problems while moving boxes. I went in today and he prescribed a beta-blocker for when I have problems. I am trying to cut back on regular meds and he understands why, so I have something to take for just when I need it. I don't expect it to be very often since I don't exercise any more, but it does still sometimes happen. I am so
<font color="red">h</font><font color="purple">a</font><font color="orange">p</font><font color="blue">p</font><font color="green">y</font> to finally have something to take during a problem, so I don't have to sit and suffer, and wonder if it could lead into a heart attack or something. I can't wait for my appointment with my T on Thursday! I want to hug and say hello to the world!
I didn't tell my primary doc about my eating habits, but this is at least a start. He asked about stress, and I did mention PTSD, but that's about all. Really, I'm not too bad with stress at least regularly. I have thought about medication as needed for bad days, but it never crossed my mind when I saw the doctor today. For now, I am still psych-med free. Well, maybe I can say something next time. Oh well, I am happy for now!
luv,
inky