Quote:
Originally Posted by lynn P.
((seeker1950))  - let me understand this correctly. You told her your feelings and she said: Is she saying you're wrong for your feelings? After your other thread, I was thinking of your situation several times and I still think it was very inconsiderate, even rude to do this. Did they give you a gift for this year? A good joke is where everyone is laughing and no one is hurt.
I don't think you should call and apologize for what you said or the fact you were hurt. Like you said, you're reverting back to how your parents insisted you patch things up. I have mixed feelings about the holidays - I find them way too much pressure and way too much phoniness. I don't like the feeling of forced smiles among tense family members.
I don't think this has to cause a permanent rift unless she's stubborn. You should be able to say how you feel and the other one can respond. Is she the type to hold a grudge and cut you off next year? Would it bother you if she did? All I can say is, I would have spoke up right when she said that, so you're a better person than me. I also think you're right in calling her to explain. If someone makes a spectacle they should know how you feel. |
Ah, dear LynnP! My sis is pretty set in her ways, and sometimes I think she's brainwashed by the mega-church she attends. Her whole family is deeply immersed in their religion, and I'm pretty certain she sees no fault in what she did (also consistent in how we were raised as children). On the other hand, surveying the event and all her acquaintances, there is NO ONE else to whom she would have done such a thing, but me.
One tool I refer to is to reverse the situation, and ask myself is there any circumstance in which I would have done what sister did, and, of course, the answer is NO.
Thank you, Lynn P.
Patty
