There are plenty of people in AA who have yet to get into any scrapes with the law. Maybe more are women, I don't know, it does no good to generalize. It really doesn't really matter though. We all share/shared the same compulsion, the same shame, the same isolating tendencies, our similarities are legion compared with our differences.

5 yrs ago, I too had found a sweet spot in life. I was drinking but only socially and my life was just humming along. I too would like to regain that serenity, happiness, call it whatever you like.

It is slowly dawning on me how selfishly I've acted over the years-whether in my failure to address my bipolarism or my alcoholism. And now, at 41, faced with my father's looming health nightmare, I wish to hell I was healthier for him and my mother. I wish I had left this *******ed nonsense behind me a long time ago because to have to still deal with it now when I'm really needed by my family is just a very sad reality. I wish I was more ashamed but my addiction still wants me dead and so I'm still in a battle for my self, at a time when I can least afford to be. If you don't quit for you, quit for your family. Our drinking ripples through so many lives, we're too stoned to realize it-and then you're not present when you're most needed. Keep drinking and you're going to die from it and we all know that's no way to die. Hope you can find a good sponsor at AA who can help you feel more affinity with the group.

And feel free to share anything, any time, that's what we're here for, correct me if I'm wrong.