Quote:
Originally Posted by rainbow_rose
how can i feel safe inside me when my therapist is not there?  currently, inside my head doesn't feel safe. i have to fight fight fight the thoughts, the feelings and such.  i try to not attach to them ... just watch them as they float by.... but they are so big, it's like they fill up the space in my head and there's no place for them to go, so they just stay. |
Oh wow, this is JUST where I was at last night. It's so hard sometimes.
Last night, I colored a mandala and watched part of a movie on Netflix. And I realized...that's how I coped as a child. I colored and colored and colored, and watched Mr. Rogers whenever he was on. Something about the coloring switched off my brain. And last night, it helped, a lot. I'm kind of grateful to my little self for learning to cope that way as a child, because it was like a gift for grown up me now. Is there anything like that? Anything that's worked for you in the past?
I have voice mails from T, and those do help, a little. Hearing his voice and remembering the safety of being with him. Do you have anything from your T that will help you remember a little bit of that safety?
What DOESN'T help (me) is being alone. I know that if I call a friend to say "hi"...even if it's the LAST thing in the world I want to do...it will help me feel a little better.
And sometimes naming things...listening for six sounds in the room I'm in, mainly...helps ground me a little bit more in "now".
It's so so hard sometimes though.
to you
