twelvebars - much sympathy, and congratulations on getting clean, especially from such incredibly addictive and destructive drugs! I hope you realize that's a substantial accomplishment and a big step toward rebuilding a healthier life.

It sounds like it will help to start developing a new social circle and perhaps becoming involved in new (healthier!) activities. That might help with the loneliness, though you'll probably have to work through some anxiety with it too. You might not be ready for that part yet, but if you think you are, try looking for local events or groups that might suit your leisure interests.

However, on the other issues, I can't really say how much of an emergency situation you're in. Do you have a plan? That's a definite sign that you need to get immediate help.

If you are not on meds and you have a BP dx, you should try to get into a psych as soon as possible (assuming meds are an acceptable thing for you, some people prefer otherwise.) Getting the BP under control will probably help a lot with the substance abuse issues; if you're feeling better and more stable, you probably won't feel the need to use as strongly, and it should help with the suicidal thoughts. Mood stabilizers have made it possible for me to cut back on alcohol quite dramatically because I'm no longer self-medicating with it.

If you are feeling that it's an emergency, do go to the hospital - that's what they are for and there's no shame in seeking help when you need it. Don't worry about what others will think; it is really more important to them that you are well!